Monday, August 31, we will meet online.
Dear Friends,
This week, we will meet Monday evening, August 31, from 7-8:30PM ET online; Wednesday morning, September 2, from 7-8AM ET in person at our meditation space (3812 Northampton Street NW); and Friday, September 4, 12-1PM ET online.
On Monday, our evening meditation will be facilitated by Jill, and we will recite the Five Mindfulness Trainings and then share about the Third Training, True Love.
Thay teaches that the essence of True Love is the ability to bring happiness and joy to another person. To do this, we need to look deeply to understand the other person and to be fully present, but it goes deeper than that: to be fully present with another person, we need to be able to be present to ourselves. We cannot love and understand another person unless we have peace and harmony within ourselves and can fully accept and embrace ourselves without discrimination or criticism.
In his writings, Thay taught that our first experience of love was one of dependency. As a newborn, we were helpless and dependent on our mother or other caregiver to meet all our needs. From this foundational experience, we may, as adults, have the idea that True Love means finding someone who will meet all our needs. That is something we need to look at in ourselves.
The opening words of the Third Mindfulness Training are “Aware of the suffering caused by sexual misconduct”, so it is clear that sexual behavior is a key element of this training. Our culture and the times we live in now are sexualized in an unprecedented way, thanks to the Internet and social media. With the insight of the Mindfulness Trainings, we can see how this energy moves through the world, causing much suffering both through the expectations we put upon ourselves and each other.
Thay gives us many practices for coming in touch with our own feelings and perceptions. A key practice is to be aware of our breathing so that we can calm our body and our mind. He also asks us to take refuge in a sangha, where we can experience Loving Kindness, Joy, Compassion, and Inclusiveness (the four elements of True Love), which will help us to transform our own suffering and protect us and those we love.
I look forward to sharing with you about how the Third Mindfulness Training, True Love, manifests in your life.
With a smile,
Jill
The Third Mindfulness Training: True Love
Aware of the suffering caused by sexual misconduct, I am committed to cultivating responsibility and learning ways to protect the safety and integrity of individuals, couples, families, and society. Knowing that sexual desire is not love, and that sexual activity motivated by craving always harms myself as well as others, I am determined not to engage in sexual relations without mutual consent, true love, and a deep, long-term commitment. I resolve to find spiritual support for the integrity of my relationship from family members, friends, and sangha with whom there is support and trust. I will do everything in my power to protect children from sexual abuse and to prevent couples and families from being broken by sexual misconduct. Seeing that body and mind are interrelated, I am committed to learn appropriate ways to take care of my sexual energy and to cultivate the four basic elements of true love – loving kindness, compassion, joy, and inclusiveness – for the greater happiness of myself and others. Recognizing the diversity of human experience, I am committed not to discriminate against any form of gender identity or sexual orientation. Practicing true love, we know that we will continue beautifully into the future.